Breathe Read online

  “WHAT? He told you he loves you and I’m just finding out about this relationship now?”

  “Are you mad?”

  I pause and think for a moment. Am I mad? I mean, it’s my best friend and my brother. I should be mad. Right? “A little, I guess. I just wish you would have told me earlier.” I lean over and hug her tightly. We release and a thought crosses my mind. “So, this relationship started at a party a few months ago?”

  “Yeah. At Olive's loft.”

  “Whoa. We were all at that party. How did I not notice? What happened?”

  “I don’t know actually. We were talking with a group of people and when they started mingling with other people, we stayed near each other and spent the night flirting and talking and...” She lets out a sigh. “I've known him almost as long as I've known you, but that night, something clicked. It just kind of happened. Do me a favor though, guys. Don't tell people. Especially not your brothers. We want this to come out naturally.”

  Rafe and I nod. Both of us with cheesy grins on our faces.

  “Girl, you are one lucky bitch. He’s a hottie,” Rafe commented. Looking over at me he noticed my wincing face. “Oh, sorry Gracie, but it’s true.” He winks at Briar and she giggles.

  I turn from my childish best friend and give Briar my attention. “Do you love him, too?” I had to know. If she doesn't she needs to back off. He's been dumped on before and I'll be damned if that happens to him again.

  “I do.” I could tell she was holding back some of her happiness. What is this? She is not the emotional type. Unless that emotion is anger or annoyance.

  “How's the sex?”

  “Rafe, gross. That's my brother's sex life you're asking about. Now I'm going to be picturing him naked.”

  “It's B's too.” Ignoring me he adds, “It's pretty amazing, right?”

  Briar turns beat read this time. “Let's just say he keeps me feeling full all night.”

  “First off...ewww. I don't want to hear about my brother, um, keeping you full.”

  Briar gives me a dirty smile.

  “Second of all...awww. My best friend and my brother are doing it!” I laugh. “I am so happy for you. Both of you.” We hug again as Rafe jumps from his chair and joins in. After a few moments of that I release them both. Rafe keeps holding on. “Uh Rafe...your choking me.”

  “Oh. Sorry.” He kisses me on the cheek and goes back to his seat. “I'm just so happy that everyone is happy.” He is such a chick sometimes.

  “Enough about me and Miles. Didn’t you have a date with tall, dark and hotness last night?” Right, the date. I thought I could get out of talking about it. “How was it?”

  “Don’t you mean tall, dark and dangerous?” I flush recalling the events last night. “It was great.”

  “He owns Mercury, the club we were at a few weeks ago,” Rafe chimes in.

  “I know.” She gives an evil grin. “I met him that night.”

  “Shut up!” I scream. “You met him that night? Why didn't you tell me?”

  She shrugs. “Miles told me all about him and his businesses. What do you think of all that?”

  “I don’t know. He’s so accomplished in his life and he’s just shy of thirty.” I’m feeling more pride for him. And a bit of jealousy. All I’ve accomplished is being handed a job at Daddy’s magazine. I’m good at it, but I earn the position myself.

  “Is he a good kisser? Did he use a lot of tongue? What does he taste like? How do his hands feel? Did he touch your boobs; ya know, did he get to second base? Oh God, did you get past second base?” Rafe is freaking out and needs to breathe.

  I flush all over again. It's a dead giveaway because he smiles and nods, already knowing the answer. I don’t speak.

  “You dirty slut.”

  “Hey. I would need to sleep with more than two guys to be worthy of that title. I'm not Olive. It was just a kiss...” I grin being very excited of the thought of our small make out session. “But it actually felt like so much more. I mean our mouths were practically fucking.”

  “Damn,” Rafe says in a bit of jealousy as he sits back in chair.

  Briar joins in the grin-fest. “So, do you want to see him again?”

  “I do. I think I do. No, I really do.” A rough thought comes to mind and I frown slightly. “But do you guys think it’s too soon? I mean, Patrick and I haven’t even been apart for even a week yet.”

  “Fuck Patrick,” Rafe chimes in quickly and angrily crosses his arms. “He's been with that skank for months. It's only fair you go out and get yourself a hottie. And boy did you get the hottest of the hotties.”

  “I know. But I don't know how to date. I only know how to be Patrick's girlfriend. I apparently was not that great at it. How do I do this?”

  Stupid Patrick.

  Before they could answer, my phone buzzes. I look down to see who it is.

  My small frown turns in the opposite direction. “It’s Lincoln,” I say like a prepubescent girl.

  “Well answer it,” Rafe says excitedly. “Don't leave him with a limp dick, Gracie.”

  “Hello?”

  “Grace. Hi. It’s Linc.” He always sounds so confident and sure of himself. Just the sound of his smooth deep voice makes me melt into a puddle.

  “Hi.”

  “Is it too soon to call? I couldn’t wait the standard three days.” He laughs at himself.

  How cute. He thinks he's funny.

  “I just really wanted to hear your voice.”

  “Oh. Sure. We can talk now.” I think I may faint. He wants to talk to me already. It’s only been, like, twelve hours since our date ended.

  “Good. So, I was thinking we could get together tomorrow night. Does that work for you?”

  “Yeah. It should be okay.” I pause and smile over at my two best friends who are not so patiently listening in on the one-sided conversation. “Tomorrow night would be great.” Briar’s smile grows bigger and Rafe silently claps and bounces in his seat.

  “Okay, great. I’ll stop by your place to get you around seven-thirty. Wear something warm.” He gives a small chuckle. “As much as I love to see you in those short dresses, you’ll need to be a bit warmer for where I want to take you.”

  “And where would that be?”

  “If I told you then it wouldn’t be a surprise. You don’t want to ruin it, do you?”

  “No, I guess not.”

  “Not now, Brody...hold on a sec, Grace.” He sounds annoyed and his voice gets muffled, but I can still somewhat make out what he is saying. “What? That’s bullcrap...I’ll look at it in a minute...Damn it, Brody! I said in a minute. See if you can find something on who did it.” He sounds clearer as he comes back to me and his voice goes smooth again. “Sorry about that Grace. I should let you go. I have some things to take care of.”

  “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

  “Absolutely”

  “Okay. Bye, Lincoln.”

  “Tomorrow won’t come soon enough for me, Grace.” And with that last lovely statement he hangs up.

  He loves getting the last word. I love the last words that he says.

  “Holy crap, you guys.”

  “What did he say?” Briar asks.

  “He wants to see me tomorrow night.”

  “Omigod! Where are you going? What are you doing? And most importantly, what are you going to wear?”

  “Rafe. Slow it and tone down the gay.” I pause and gather my thoughts. The conversation with Lincoln went by so fast I barely had time to react. “I don’t know where we’re going or what we’re doing. But he did tell me to dress warmer than I did on the last date.”

  “Interesting.” Briar slowly nods her head up and down, her eyes squinting in thought.

  We sit and finish our lunch chatting about my upcoming date, Briar's thing with my brother and Rafe’s on again/off again romance with Sam ‘The Englishman’. As we all stand up and get our jackets on, Briar’s phone rings.

  “Hey babe.” It must be Miles.
“I’m with her now...No we just got done with lunch...Okay. Well, how do you suppose I do that? She’ll see it anyway...No, let Rafe and I do it with her. Call you later, okay...Love you, too.”

  I stare at her quizzically. That conversation was obviously about me. “What gives?”

  “Let’s go back to your office.”

  “I don’t want to go to the office. What is it?”

  “Let's go to your apartment then.” Briar’s tone is laced with concern and anxiousness. She softens her gaze. She sighs and whispers, “Red.”

  “Fuck,” Rafe whispers. He wraps my jacket around me and holds me by the shoulders.

  We step outside and hail a cab to take us to my apartment. No one speaks during the ride. I’m getting worried and it’s hard to stay calm. The anxiety is building in the pit of my stomach. This may not end well.

  When we reach the apartment we immediately get settled onto the couch, Briar on the shorter end and Rafe and I cuddling on the longer end. I ready myself for whatever she has to unleash onto me.

  “We’re home now. Just tell me what’s going on.”

  She sighs again. “Miles said that Trackeronline has a spread about you...and Linc.”

  Trackeronline is a website that follows celebrities and the like around and lets everyone know what they’re doing in a picture timeline. The pictures are submitted by whoever wants to give them. The kicker is they get paid for them and no one ever learns who they are.

  Assholes.

  “Me and Lincoln? How? When?” Rafe's arms get tighter around me and I start to play around with the lily charm to try and gather some strength.

  “Apparently from last night.” She stands and walks towards the stairway to my office. She says over her shoulder, “I’ll get the laptop and we’ll look at it together.” Within a minute she’s back and looking up Trackeronline. Her mouth drops and she glances up and stares into my eyes. “Double red.” This is definitely not good.

  My breathing starts to get more shallow as she scoots over to sit directly beside me. Rafe and I sit up and he grabs my hand. We all look at the screen together.

  “Jesus Christ,” I gasp and slap the hand not holding Rafe’s over my mouth.

  “That doesn’t look good,” Rafe says as he shakes his head back and forth in amazement. “We need to find out who the fuck did this before it gets to Page Six and beyond.” Gone is the gay. Rafe has his deep fighting voice turned up to high volume.

  I stare at the screen in disbelief. Looking at these pictures of me and Linc at his club dancing and flirting and me sitting, cuddled up in his lap do not look like the fun, romantic time that I had. They look dirty and tawdry. We look as though we are in compromising positions from these angles; practically fucking in a chair. In one particular photo, we’re sweaty, most likely from dancing, and my skirt is hiked up so far, my goodies are almost showing. His hand is high up on my thigh. My head is turned into him and his is in my neck.

  Another photo is on the dance floor with my back up against his chest, arms up and hands clasped behind his neck. His hands are splayed out on my stomach. My eyes are closed and his head is bent into me, kissing my neck.

  I let that one wall fall just one time and look what happens. The glass needs to go back up. And fast.

  “How did they get these?”

  “I don’t know, honey. Miles is trying to find that out. Your dad already called him at his office about this.” Oh crap. Daddy knows.

  Why am I surprised? Daddy knows everything.

  “Should I call Lincoln?”

  Rafe reaches over my shoulder and brushes my opposite arm. “I don’t know. What do you think Briar?”

  “I don’t know either. I mean, you two have only been on the one date. Let me call Miles back and see what he says.” She stands and heads to the kitchen to call him.

  “What am I going to do? What will Lincoln think?” Reality slaps me in the face. “What will Patrick think?” I start to cry. God damn it. I've been crying so much lately. As if on cue, Duritz runs out of my bedroom and leaps into my lap. This is overwhelming and I'm rushed with guilt. My wonderful night has turned into a dirty, filthy mess. I should have known that something like this would happen. It's God's way of telling me that I shouldn't be with someone outside of my social circle. Or maybe I shouldn't be with anyone at all.

  Pictures of me show up all the time but something about these, on this site, make me uneasy. And with all the Patrick crap it just heightens all these emotions. I’m strong enough to handle most of it and I have the brothers to help, but this time is different.

  I blame Patrick for all of this. He put this whole thing in motion.

  Fuck you, Patrick.

  “She’s fine. Just get here when you can... Love you too.” Briar walks back into the living room and looks at me with sad eyes. She plops down next to me and tosses her phone on the couch beside her. “He’s still looking into a few things. He says he’ll take care of Linc.”

  “Is he mad at me?” I ask.

  Her brows furrow. “Why would he be mad at you?”

  “For going out with Lincoln in the first place.” I never told Miles about the date. I guess I just assumed that Lincoln would talk to him about it. Miles did give him my number, so I’m sure he got his blessing as well.

  “No, he’s not mad at you. He’s just as frustrated about this as you are. You know he loves you and only wants to protect you from all of this.”

  I put my head in my hands and quietly sob into them. My friends each wrap an arm around me and pull themselves closer, almost squishing the puppy. As we sit in a silent huddle, my phone buzzes. Rafe gets up and pulls the phone from my handbag, looks at the screen and hands it to me.

  “You may want to take this, Gracie,” he says apathetically as he points the phone in my direction.

  I take the pink phone in my shaky hand and cautiously look at the screen.

  Just breathe.

  After taking a deep breath to quickly try to stop the crying, I hesitantly answer. “Hello.” I say quietly.

  “Grace.” Linc sounds panicked. “Oh, God. Are you okay?”

  “You talked to Miles.”

  “Just got off the phone with him, but I knew before he called. Are you okay?”

  “What did he tell you?”

  “Grace. Answer me. Are you okay?”

  I can't answer. I'm afraid to answer.

  “Damn it. Tell me or I’m coming over there to see for myself,” he demands. I can hear him slamming things around.

  “I’m fine. You don’t need to come over.”

  “Are you sure? I know you’re at home. I'm at Mercury and can be there in twenty minutes.”

  “No. I’m fine. Really. Rafe and Briar are here. We’re just going to lay low in the apartment the rest of the day.” I pause to try and pull the tears back up into my eyes. But I can’t. This is too much. I need to let him go. I need to get him off the phone and let him go; create some space from him. He doesn’t need to be a part of this. The life I lead is different from his. He doesn’t need the drama and attention that being with someone like me gets. It could ruin everything he has worked so hard to build for himself.

  “Just breathe, Grace,” Linc encourages.

  Deep breath in. Let it out.

  “Has anyone been calling you asking questions or emailing or texting or anything? If so you need to tell me.”

  I don't answer him.

  He whispers, “Grace, talk to me.”

  “I think we should cancel tomorrow. This needs time to blow over.” I pause again and wait for his response. He says nothing. I think I pissed him off. I can’t think about that right now. “I have to go.”

  “I don't thin-”

  “I have to go.” I hang up and push my phone into Rafe’s hand. “I need to be alone for a bit. I’ll be in my room. Let me know when Miles gets here.”

  “Okay,” Briar states with concern. They both watch me with sympathetic looks as I uneasily walk to my bedroom, followed cl
osely by my trusty canine sidekick.

  Chapter Eleven

  My eyelids are so heavy.

  Damn it.

  What the hell time is it anyway? How long have I been sleeping?

  I flutter my eyes open. It’s still somewhat light out, so it must be early evening. I shuffle to the ensuite bathroom and fix myself up a bit. As I change into skinny jeans, a pink tee and white hoodie, I hear voices in the living room. I wonder if Miles is here yet. I really need him right now. He always knows what to do and say in this kind of situation. Even with Patrick by my side, these kinds of messes would bother me to no end. I don’t have very thick skin. Transparent skin is a better term for it. But Miles is my constant protector. Always has been since we were kids. Besides Rafe, he’s the only man I can truly confide in.

  I should show my face to my supportive gang. I scoop up Duritz and head out to the living room. Everyone must be getting hungry because I’m starving. I slowly, and when I say slowly I mean tortoise speed, make my way out of my bedroom. Staring down at my feet as I scuttle away from my room, I quickly stop when I hear that deep voice that I'm growing accustomed to. It’s not Miles and definitely not Rafe.

  Lincoln.

  Lifting my head, I find myself staring right into his sexy eyes. He leaps from the bar stool and rushes to me, hauling me up into his big arms. By instinct, I drop Duritz and wrap my arms around his sides. He lifts me high enough so my feet are no longer touching the ground.

  “Grace.” He whispers into my neck. Melting into him, I let out a shaky sigh. “Just breathe.” He nuzzles slightly.

  What is happening with me? I was totally ready to let go of whatever it is we have, but now...

  “I’m fine.” He doesn’t let go of the tight hold. “Really, I am. You can let me down now.” He does reluctantly and I walk further into the living room.

  Rafe leaps over the coffee table and runs to me. I welcome his arms as he envelopes me. Burying my head in his shoulder, I let out a few tears. He’s good therapy for me. “That boy has had the worst look on his face since he got here. Like a sad lost giant puppy. He kept staring down the hallway. I'd say he has it bad for you, Gracie,” he whispers softly in my ear.